08 Mar The Most Common Misconceptions About Divorce
Many different thoughts come rushing into a person’s mind when they hear the word divorce. People automatically assume there will be this combative courtroom battle where lawyers duke it out. Who can blame them? Popular culture, such as films like Marriage Story, makes us believe the process is awful. While it can get nasty in certain situations, this article will debunk the most common misconceptions about divorce. Remember—there is not just one right way to feel about the process.
There’s One Type
Some people believe that all divorces are the same. Yet, a previous blog post discussed the different types of divorce that everyone should know. Here a few kinds that people should research:
- A no-fault divorce is one of the most popular options in the legal circuit. Essentially, the process is exactly as it sounds. Both you and your partner decide that no one is to blame for the separation in your legal statement to the courts.
- An at-fault divorce is the opposite of its counterpart. When a person files for an at-fault divorce, it means the other partner broke the marital contract by means of adultery, abuse, or neglect. At-fault divorce is not an option in Washington State.
- A collaborative divorce works like a no-fault divorce, meaning that neither person blames the other for the marriage ending. In this scenario, the couple works together to reach a settlement determining what life will look like for both parties after the marriage ends.
You Do Not Need a Lawyer
Indeed, a collaborative divorce is an ideal situation because it means you and your spouse do not want things to get heated. Though, as we all know, we do not live in an ideal world. Whether you are trying to get a collaborative divorce or things are contentious, you will need a lawyer.
Some couples try to work things out on their own to avoid the courts. Yet, attorneys need to be there to help with mediation and explain the legalities of the matter. They have experience handling these situations, and even if you have been divorced before, their knowledge will prove valuable. Accordingly, you might consider contacting LaCoste Family Law sooner rather than later. Our legal team will guide you and your spouse through one of the most challenging times in your life.
You Won’t Get Emotional
Ending a marriage is heartbreaking no matter what terms you and your ex are on. No one ever gets married and imagines they will separate. For this reason, feelings will come to the surface, whether you are expecting them to or not. In a quarrelsome divorce, these emotions might be more obvious. Another pro tip is that there are no rules about moving on. You do not have to celebrate and get ready for dating if you are unprepared. Also, try to remember that this is not about winning. Rather, divorce is a complex process that results in a final dissolution of a marriage.
It Goes Quickly
Speaking of complexities, getting a divorce is not quick. Instead, there are multiple steps involved that can drag things out for an extended period. To begin with, one person must file papers in their state of residency. Some states require you to prove how long you have lived there before they will let you move forward. In addition, when you and your partner cannot agree on things, things may go longer.
The primary reason why contentious divorces take longer to process is that this means mediation fails. During the mediation stage, each party may hire an attorney to represent their interests and discuss them together. However, if the two of you refuse to compromise, mediation fails, and you may have to go to trial. Divorce trials are lengthy and costly, and it could be months before things are finalized.
Mom Always Gets Custody
Now, it is true that divorcing with children can make things a little harder. However, one of the most common misconceptions about divorce is that the mother always gets custody. The truth of the matter is that several factors influence child custody that fathers and other caregivers should understand. Here are a few things to keep in mind:
- You will have to prove to the courts that you can provide a stable environment for the child if you want joint custody.
- There should be no history of neglect or abuse towards the child if you want shared time with your little one.
- You need to show that you can financially care for any children while they are under your care. This means you will also have to pay child support.
- Social media may also affect child custody decisions because the judge does not want to see you bashing your ex or display more money than you have relayed to the courts.
People Choose Sides
One of the most challenging things about divorce is that your marriage is not the only relationship that changes. Though, this does not necessarily have to be the case. You will grieve during this process, so you may need to rely on your loved ones during this time. You may have to give the people in your life, time to grieve, as well. Give them time to get to know you individually if they have only known you as a couple. Sure, the relationship may change, but that does not mean it has to end.
People let others influence their thoughts about divorce. The reality is, there is no right way to feel about the dissolution of your marriage. You should not feel angry if you do not, and you should let yourself feel sad if you’re not. Remember to rely on your loved ones to get through this so you can come out stronger on the other side.
Thankfully, LaCoste Family Law is here to be one of the allies you need. We have one of the top-rated divorce lawyers in Washington State, and our goal is to advocate for our clients, no matter what their situation is. We understand that some people do not get a fair shake in court, and we want to break that mold. So, whether you are working through a collaborative or contentious divorce, we will be by your side the entire time. We never abandon our clients during their time of need, and we will help you see a more realistic portrayal of divorce.